The Yes Challenge – Balancing Life
The day after I posted an article about the necessity for women to say NO, I ran across a wonderful blog by a mom who was inspired by the word YES. The post I ran across was about lust. She wrote with gusto and honesty about claiming her life. She also motivated many other bloggers to examine their life as well with her challenge on writing about a specific topic. I’m not someone who throws out an article in 15 minutes so by the time I finished thinking through the topic of the day, they’re onto to the word Yes.
Photo by Kudaker
I thought about why Jen and Sara felt so liberated about saying Yes. Then I realized, it’s because of the children. When the kids were young, I ran around saying no all the time on a personal basis.
- No: You cannot flush another bottle of shampoo down the toilet.
- No: You cannot try and see if your head fits between those staircase posts. (We were able to saw the wooden one open and save one kid.)
- No: You can’t try to drive at 13.
- No: You can’t have a cell phone even if Karen’s mom gave her one.
The list goes on but saying No does have an effect. No is a negative word and it makes you feel bad when you say it even if it’s the right thing to do. To counter that guilty feeling, I went in the opposite direction at work and for charity. I couldn’t stop saying YES until I got burned out. It took me a long time to learn balance between No and Yes.
These are the YES that helped me reclaimed myself.
Yes – I will take care of myself too. If I’m not here, the family goes down.
Yes – I will never forget to dream and dream big.
Yes – I will set goals and achieve them one by one.
Yes – Do I still like myself as a person? The answer should always be yes. If not, I need to examine why.
Yes – I will live consciously every day even if it’s just for a moment
Yes – I will be thankful every day for all the gifts in my life
Yes – I will never forget to tell my family that I love them every day even if it means that I have to (gag, spit) text after the 7th try because that kid won’t answer the phone.
Yes – I will try to make a difference
Yes – I will challenge myself to do something that I fear
Yes – I will learn from every person I meet
There are many other Yes in my arsenal but these are the ones that I trot out every day in my mind. They have helped me lived a life full of love, faith, adventures and richness. I’m not looking to find perfection but just enjoying the journey to whoever that I will become. Betty White, you’re my role model. Beth, here’s to those onion layers that we’re building for our 90s.
Here’s your challenge. How would you use YES in your life?
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Don’t forget to check out Aidan Rowley’s book Life after Yes. She’s the woman who inspired the topic chosen by Jen and Sarah.
http://www.ivyleagueinsecurities.com/2010/05/happy-lay-day/
Those are wonderful things to say “YES” to, but I have to say, the things you said “NO” to were pretty reasonable! (Though my daughters would probably argue for flushing more shampoo down the toilet…)
CK,
Thank you so much for visiting. You would appreciate this, he started with flushing jacks down the toilet at first for the noise and the swirling actions. Next came the larger toys, then he noticed that the flush hole was round so he collected every round bottles in the house and tested to see how large it can fit. By the time I intervened, we already had a flood and a bowl full of bottles. It’s interesting what we remember from thousands of little moments. Although I was happy not remembering stealth pooh until I was reminded by the Yes blogs.
By the way, what’s SAHM?
SAHM = Stay at Home Mom
LOL. Thank you.
Hi Kim – I’m glad you found Sarah’s post as inspiring as I did. And I really appreciate your reminder to say YES to ourselves even in the midst of the chorus of NOs that inevitably resounds through a house with children. I especially appreciate that your list of YESes is really about ideas and ways of being in the world – and not just about buying things to make ourselves happy. Thanks!
Hi Kristen, so glad you’re here. I found all of the Five for Ten posts inspiring. I’m still reading through the list a couple every night and savoring them. I think it’s going to carry me through the summer since I found it so late.
I adore that your list of YES is really about YOU and not about children. Because it all starts there, with us, with one syllable at a time. We cannot expect more or less of our children without first turning inward, to ourselves. Without first cultivating that positivity from within.
Without first challenging ourselves, as you say, and trying to make a difference to the people right around us.
Hi Sarah,
I’m so glad you got all the way down to my little post. You and Jen were so inspirational to all of us with your ideas.
My list of Yes may seem self centered but I’ve learned the hard way that you have to take care of yourself first, not selfishly but caring as someone important too. I’ve personally hit rock bottom not doing that so it’s from painful experience. I was and am still the main family bread winner. I’ve made sure that the whole family would be fine without me but we still have a couple of unmitigated risks that I still need to save for. I love my parents and don’t want them to suffer in their 90s and 100s.